For over a decade so many of my Saturdays were spent in the rush of a wedding. Up with the sun… driving backroads… loading film & carrying gear… guests & vows & florals & timelines… chasing the sun… the weighty anticipation of moments & moments & moments of full, exhilarated love.
So even after nearly a year away from these bigger events, an open Saturday feels strange to me. Full of possibility but also kinda mysterious… like what do I do with it?? Especially when the answer can’t be “spend time with the people I love” cause we’re in a world that needs to remain apart. The way I answer that question feels important somehow.
My anecdote for this weird sensation has been to bring that same exuberance of a wedding day to my personal photography projects, time with Craig, being out in nature or honestly just binge-watching old movies while I drink coffee cause that was neeeeeever a type of Saturday I used to have.
I’m not always succeeding. Sometimes I still feel lost. Sometimes I even feel guilty. My career has shifted in monumental ways & it’s also the least monumental of the shifts taking place in our country & world. But I love photography deeply… I still feel its awesome pull in any form it’s available to me. That makes me feel more at home in myself in the chaos of the world.